Conflict Resolution: Part II

Ghandi once said, "Conflict isn't necessarily bad because when you have conflict everybody learns something. Both sides learn something about themselves and each other. It becomes a learning and strengthening process". He understood the value of conflict to individuals and organizations.

What is conflict? We have defined it as, "the perceived and/or actual incompatibility of needs, interests and/or goals between two or more interdependent parties (Coltri)". Simply put, any relationship that depends on others where differences exist, could potentially become a conflict.

A Conflict may gradually develop over time. There are three levels of conflict as follows:

• Difference: A different perception on the same issue. Is usually not significant.


• Dispute: It is significant and usually a single issue that is driven and dealt with in the here and now.


• Conflict: Unresolved disputes that are highly complex and intensely identified on a personal level.

How often have you seen a difference eventually turn into a conflict? I worked with an Executive in an organization and one of his team members. The problems began with a difference. The team member made a simple request and the Executive discounted it. The individual was unwilling to address the issue at this level. A series of events happened that moved the difference to a dispute (she/he does not listen to me and value my input). Eventually it became a conflict with multiple issues to include; a lack of trust, respect, and honesty, and no clearly defined roles and responsibilities. A difference if not addressed may turn into a full blown conflict costing the organization time and money to resolve it.

Based on what we have been discussing, how often in your organization does a difference become a conflict? What is the cost to your organization?

Conflict Resolution: Part I

Recently while working with a group, I posed the question, "when you think of conflict what words come to mind?" Words like resentment, fear, challenge, stress and anger hit the flipchart immediately. It is no wonder that individuals tend to be conflict averse. However, there is another side to conflict. When conflict is managed and resolved it can create more innovative, creative, and synergistic solutions.

It starts with belief. Do you see conflict as something to be avoided or something to be embraced? Do you see it as a setback or a normal part of everyday interactions? The choice is yours. The more you embrace conflict, the more willing you are to address it.

In this four part series on conflict resolution, let us begin by defining the word. My favorite textbook definition comes from Conflict Diagnosis and Alternative Dispute Resolution by Lauri S. Coltri. She defines conflict as follows:

"The percieved and/or actual incompatibility of needs, interests and/or goals between two or more interdependent parties."

It is easy to see from this definition how conflict can occur in organizations on a day-to-day basis.

There is also the impact ongoing conflict has in organizations. Psychometrics Canada surveyed 350 Human Resources Professionals. The survey found the following:

• 43% have witnessed someone being fired as a result of conflict
• 81% of those surveyed have seen conflict lead to someone leaving the organization
• 77% have seen it result in sickness or absence

The replacement cost of individuals alone is expensive for organizations. Additional research demonstrates the cost of conflict as follows:

• Watson and Hoffman in an early study found that practicing managers spend 42% of their time reaching agreement with others when conflict occurred.
• Estimates are the 65% of performance problems result from strained relationships with co-workers (MTI)
• According to a Fortune Magazine survey, resolution of employee disputes consumes 20% of a top executive's time.

For these, and many other reasons, we will be discussing conflict. What it is, and how to resolve it. We welcome your discussion and feedback over the next month as we delve into this topic. So how does conflict impact your organization?

High Performance Teams: Part III

I recently had the opportunity to facilitate a workshop on "Creating a High Performance Team". The foundation of the workshop was the book The Five Dysfunctions of a Team. It was mentioned in an earlier blog. Accountability seemed to be an issue for a number of participants in the room.

Accountability as defined by Lencioni is "The willingness of team members to remind one another when they are not living up to the performance standards of the group" (Field Guide, 61). How many of us are willing to do that in our organizations?

Lencioni does offer some practical suggestions for ensuring accountability:

1. Team Effectiveness Exercise: Each participants receives feedback from his/her peers and manager. Each team members provide one strength and one area that he/she must improve or eliminate for the good of the team. The leader receives the information first.
2. Publication of goals and standards: Be clear about what you are trying to accomplish.
3. Simple and regular progress reviews: Hold monthly,or at least quarterly reviews for the goals and standards that have been set.
4. Team Rewards: Recognize the team for a job well done.

These simple steps can make a huge difference for your organization.

We have talked about high performance teams over the last three weeks. How do you create a high performing team?

High Performance Teams: Part II

Previously we discussed the four stages of team development; forming, storming, norming and performing. As I thought about the last stage, I wondered how do teams become high performing? How do they run like a well-oiled machine?

One of my favorite business books is the Five Dysfunctions of a Team. It answers the question as to how a team becomes high performing. Patrick Lencioni examines what causes dysfunctional teams. He lists five as follows:

Absence of trust

Fear of conflict

Lack of commitment

Avoidance of accountability

Inattention to results

Trust is the foundation of a high performing team. If trust can be developed, it will pave the way for greater conflict resolution, team commitment, accountability and results. Trust is the foundation of all successful relationships. Trust involves vulnerability.

How do we develop trust? Hyley Bracey in his book, Building Trust; How to Get It! How to Keep it! provides insight. His five step model utilizes the acronym TRUST:

T means be transparent

R means be responsive

U means use caring

S means be sincere

T means be trustworthy

Although this is one model, what has worked for you in building trust to create high performing teams?

High Performance Teams

Facilitating team process is one of my favorite consulting assignments. Each team has its own "culture" and way of operating. Michael Jordan once said, "Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence wins championships". The next several blogs will be devoted to discussing high performance teams.

Understanding the stages of team development is critical when building a high performance team. In my opinion, the best model comes from research done by Bruce Tuckman. He currently directs the Academic Learning Lab at Ohio State University.

With a PhD in Psychology, Bruce wrote an article in 1965 entitled, Developmental Sequence in Small Groups. He describes the four stages of team development as forming, storming, norming and performing. In 1977 he added a stage called adjourning.

Understanding the four stages offers great insights to both the team members and its leader. Our starting point begins with examining each stage in greater detail;

• Forming: Excitement is high. It is new and fun and no one is really clear what they are doing. In fact, team members may be on their best behavior. It is a time of orientation.


• Storming: This is a normal part of the team development process. Roles are assigned, and personalities and egos begin to show. Team members may not feel safe to be open and honest. There is conflict and polarization around interpersonal issues. Individuals may confront and challenge one another.


• Norming: At this stage, there is greater role clarity and cohesiveness beginning to develop. New standards begin to evolve. The team is beginning to jell as a unit. Confidence improves, relationships strengthen and differences of opinion are respected.


• Performing: The team has become a well-oiled machine. They are able to share leadership, delegate assignments and work autonomously. Goals and targets are reached regularly and effectively. Structural issues have been resolved.


• Adjourning: There are times when a team has been assembled for a particular task or initiative. When the assignment is completed the team is most often disbanded. This can be very difficult for team members, particularly if individuals have worked well together.

When a new member joins the team, the stages of development may begin again. In addition, teams may move in and out of the stages. With the norming and performing stages, the need for formal leadership diminishes.

Recently I worked with an organization that merged two cultures. Team members self-identified as operating between the forming and storming stages. This information provided them the opportunity to strategize ways to more effectively navigate through the storming phase and move closer to becoming a high performance team.

Armed with this information, your team can identify ways to become more effective. The end result is a higher functioning team!!!

When you think about your team, what stage of development fits?

Listening: The Heart of the Matter

Recently while sitting in a meeting I observed cross talk, side conversations, and individuals reading email. I wondered if we really listen to one another any more. My hypothesis is that if leaders would ask great questions and REALLY listen to the answer, we could dramatically improve organizational effectiveness. Today we will address the area of listening.

There are three listening levels as follows(Madelyn Burley-Allen):

Level I: The listener attempts to see things from the speaker's point of view. It is listening for content and context. As Stephen Covey said, "Seek ye first to understand and then be understood". This is called empathetic listening.

Level II: The listener is hearing words and unable to hear the deeper meaning of what is being said. She/he is more concerned about content than feeling.

Level III: The listener is tuning in and out. She/he is more interested in talking than listening.

So, how do we become a better listener?

1. Make a commitment to become a better listener.

2. Stay present! It is easy to let the mind wander and think about multiple tasks at hand. Level I listening is being present in the here and now.

3. Keep an open mind. Avoid listening from judgement, biases, and preconceived notions.

4. Resist external distractions. Stay focused on the conversation.

5. When appropriate take notes. It is particularly important when talking with clients.

6. Ask open-ended questions for clarification. These include what, how, when and where questions. Avoid using "why" as it puts the speaker on the defensive.

7. Use the communication skills of paraphrasing, summarizing and reflecting (repeat what was said using the listener's words.

It takes practice to become a Level I listener. However, the benefits well outweigh the effort. What can you do to improve your listening skills?

Do You Know Where You Are Going???

The story of Alice-in-Wonderland encountering the Cheshire Cat is so poignant to individuals and organizations today. The conversation goes as follows:

Alice:"Which road do I take?"
Cheshire Cat: "Where do you want to go?"
"I don't know Alice answered."
"Then said the Cat, it doesn't matter. If you don't know where you are going, any road will get you there." (Alice In Wonderland)

There are times when organizations are unclear about their direction and what they really, really want. Much like Alice-in-Wonderland, they may take multiple, unrelated roads that end up in a circular motion. It can impact their decision making, the customers and employees when confusion exists around company direction.

To insure you have a roadmap that will get you the result you want, here are some questions to ask:

-Do you have a clearly articulated, documented and communicated vision and mission?
-What are your three to five core values that guide the decision-making in the organization?
-What specifically do you want to accomplish over the next one, three or five years?
-How will you ensure that happens?
-How will you be accountable?

Once you have answered those questions successfully, how will you then communicate to the entire organization the direction of the company?

This doesn't have to be a complicated process and it should have some degree of fluidity. I worked with an organization that developed a "roadmap" for the business. After the first year, the company experienced an increase in both revenue and profit margin. It really does work!

As you think about your organization, what is its roadmap?